Chapter V: LXVI
Venus originally deemed this comic a little too saucy for the front page.
The WIP for this was posted earlier, with some commentary I’ll repeat here:
A few days ago I rejected a comic in progress because the anatomy was off (arms all over the place, chins in odd locations), but since I’d already thumbnailed it out, I’ve decided to finish it. I was experimenting again with layout, and I’d like to follow through on the idea.
Here it is in thumbnails-and-sketches form; click pic to see the whole thing. NSFW for bare bottoms, female chests without nipples, suggestive balloon tail placement, and “what are those hands doing outside the panel borders?” I could make it completely SFW and tame, but this isn’t an all-ages comic and, as I frequently pontificate, it wouldn’t be an issue if the images were merely battlefield slaughter and bloody assassinations. It’s also probably NSFW for being on the topic of “three portraits of using sex to get someone’s attention.”
The final version will be a wee bit censored, and there will be some tweaks to the balloon placement/flow. I’d have posted this WIP as a bonus on Patreon, where I don’t feel as concerned about little kids meandering by, but I’m still waiting on follow-up from Patreon tech support on technical issues.
I think it’s juuuust fine as is; grownup without being “adult”, suggestive without being slutty. I suspect that any young’uns coming across it would either 1) be old enough to “get it” anyway, or 2) too young to understand even with the context.
My real issue would be, though…when the heck did Vibia get into this mess and what’s her game here? Is this somehow related to her slipping out of the lupanar back in LVIII after Mus turns up? She seemed rather secretive about that…but suddenly she turns up in a Flavian bed. Is she selling information…or searching for it? Or is this just a likely-to-be-well-compensated roll in the imperial hay?
Whatever the reason, the plot(s) appear to be thickening…
She provided some information to Sabinus before (and here he is plotting to use lowlifes to check on nobodies, as he would put it, because he can be kind of a loud jerk). And, as any good freelancer knows, once you get a gig, you try to keep the client interested in working with you again….
Nice “female chest” there! With or without nipples.
It took me several minutes of confusion to realize this was parallel stories running top-to-bottom. The natural tendency is linearly left-to-right. Maybe a more obvious line of demarcation between the story lines?
Maybe there’s something I can do with the panel borders to clearly divide it into columns. I’ll tweak.
I had the intention to comment on the parallel stories. The current layout is a bit tad confunsing. Comic books usually place a single story per page and on the next story they place a meanwhile… or at the same time … legend.
Apart from that, it is nice to see the story moving. Alexander has now entered his maximum danger zone. Domitian is angry and it is quite possible that he will use Alexander to hurt Felix because he cannot hurt Felix directly.
Sometimes an experiment works, sometimes it simply doesn’t work at all…
I will consider figuring out how to fix as being part of the process.
I didn’t find it confusing at all. Read top-to-bottom, it’s parallel; read L-to-R, it’s a series of quick cuts showing simultaneity. I’d leave it and even play more with interleaving if the events start flying thick and fast!
There’s enough family resemblance between Sabinus and Domitian that it was a little tricky to sort out at first. They’re quite distinct in profile, less distinct head on in the small panels.
I like the concept of running the parallel plots in columns rather than rows. Especially as Mus and Felix seem to be sinking into ever-rising trouble. Stay brave!
I had the same problem; thought that Domitian had suddenly gone from devoted husband to sly dog in less than a couple of panels…
Are you wearing a sword, or just glad to see me?
Why not both??
HAPPY HANUKKAH MUS!!!!!
Happy Hanukkah, Mus! 😀
Maybe Domitian will let him put a menorah in the palace window. Or maybe Mus’ll do it anyway. He’s been feeling defiant these days 🙂